上世纪80年代初，我开始尝试抽象绘画。当时觉得很兴奋，好像找到了一种新的绘画表达方式，一种自我释放的通道。那有意或无意间呈现出来的直接而单纯的画面效果，满足了我尝试新绘画的好奇心。时隔二十几年后，回忆起来仍然记忆犹新。

　　那时我在工艺美校就读。我结识了余友涵先生。他是我们工艺美校的老师。他对塞尚的喜好和研究使我深受启发。当时国内艺术资讯贫乏，对国外抽象绘画的了解主要来自于有限的几本画册。我们看到什么学什么，难免有先入为主的倾向。但我还是从中了解了一些基本的国外抽象艺术的特点与风格，这与当时学校的艺术教育有很大不同。在那特定的环境下，我们师生之间的交流有特别的意义。

　　余老师为人谦虚，对学生很随和。我们之间经常随兴谈论自己的思想，畅所欲言。有一次，在聊天时，余老师给我看一幅他的画作并要我谈看法。画面上没有任何具体形象，只有一种图形与笔触的呈现，我感到迷惑，但又觉好奇。我依据色彩和笔触在画面中形式的组合关系，谈出了对他作品的感受和想法。慢慢地，余老师周围聚集了一批学生。我们经常交流，讨论各自作品并相互借鉴。在——次讨论中，余老师提出“绘画只有现代感还不够，一定要有自己的民族性”，这成为我们当时尝试抽象绘画时所追求的方向。1985年，余友涵老师作为主要的组织者，和我们（丁乙、秦一峰、艾得无、汪谷青、我）一起在复旦大学举办了“现代绘画——六人展”，很多大学生和上海画家圈子里的人都前来观着。有些学生说看不懂，问是什么意思？有的人说从中得到了一些对个人经历的回忆……这次画展表达了我们当时追求“现代绘画”的愿望。那时大家都很单纯。没有画廊，也无法卖画。纯粹是出于喜欢，大家展示自己的作品.

　　1985年夏，我考入中央工艺学院（现该名为清华大学美术学院），学习壁画与装饰绘画。在此期间，我依然进行抽象绘画的尝试。所幸的是抽象绘画与我所学的专业在某些方面有相通之处，这使我对绘画本身遂渐有了更多的把握与判断的能力。90年代初我去了纽约，一呆就是十几年，2006年回国。

　　抽象绘画是西方现代艺术运动的产物，它是对几个世纪的西方具象绘画的反叛。塞尚对绘画本身的分析，康定斯基、马列维奇给每一块色彩、每一笔触所赋予的内在精神以及平面之中的精确表达，都已成为广为人知的西方现代绘画的标志之一。他们崇尚“为艺术而艺术”的理想，把形式主义推向了极致。上世纪八、九十年代的西方后现代思潮开始对艺术、对绘画有了新的命题。抽象绘画在艺术上的成功早已成为历史。在国外，人们不再对抽象艺术感到震撼或困惑。抽象艺术已经深入到生活的各个层面，已成为学院教学的一部分。这表明图像符号的形式不可能成为抽象艺术探索的最终目的。抽象绘画在今天的艺术领域应该有新的表达立足点和艺术要求。杜尚曾经将所有的平面绘画（包括抽象绘画）比作一种刺激视网膜的游戏。他这断言可能忽视了绘画，这种个人行为，含有一种内在的心理需求。心理与心灵的世界千变万化并可有无穷尽的方式进行解读。从这一点看，杜尚可能只是从科学层面去解释绘画的意义，而把其心灵的神秘推到了“观念”一边。只要人类精神或心灵活动不断延续，绘画这一行为方式不会改变。抽象绘画把我们引向对自身的纯粹探索。

　　在我们生活中，如果不能用语言或文字来表达那种不可名状的内心需要，那么抽象绘画可能是——种最好的表达方式之一。它与音乐一样。前者通过平面展示在空间中，后者以声音存在于时间。画笔落实到画布上，就会有一个“图像”的出现：一块石头或一粒灰尘。既具体又抽象，全凭观者自己的解读。但“图像”具体地留在了画布上，通过视觉印在了观者的脑海里，这“图像”开始在绘画中产生了所谓的“形式”。但形式并不是抽象绘画的最终目的。

　　我希望找到一种表达方法去瓦解人们关于具象与抽象的界线。艺术家可能更关注“图像”背后包含的某种关联与意味，否则抽象绘画又落到形式主义的泥潭里不能自拔。抽象的表现形式应该是艺术家的一种表达“方便”，是艺术家在他漫长而神秘探索道路上留下的一个一个点，是过程中的一个一个标记，是一种内在物质表象。我更愿意用“散漫的抽象”来形容画家在抽象绘画过程中所具有的个人特点。抽象画在后现代之后的艺术发展中，已不再是半个世纪前抽象画家们那样追求个人符号化的探索过程，抽象绘画的纯粹性应该具有广泛意义上的包容，它是全面而整体的，它不再是或图、或线、或点、或特定的方法下的特定肌理效果而已。它应该是既纯真又包罗万象的绘画语言本身，它既是客观物质的充分表现，又是主观冥想的心灵产物，“一花一世界”的东方式想象模式，将会使发起于西方的“抽象画”这——绘画形式在中国得到新的发展，其结果可能是客观物质世界的形形色色的现象与艺术家心中的理想图象合二为—。

　　因此，是否放弃对“图像”符号的执着而追随”心灵”的自由冥想，可能是抽象绘画在今后发展中有待于探讨的一个命题。

The necessity of abstraction--the story of my abstract painting

　　From 1980's, I had begun the abstract painting. It was very exciting for me to find a new method of painting ,a way of self-releasing. The effect resulted in the intentional or unintentional painting satisfied my curiosity for new painting. The memory is still very clear even I remind it after twenty years.

　　I studied in Shanghai Arts and Crafts College while I tried the abstract painting. I got to know Mr. Yu Youhan, the teacher of the college. His appreciation and study of Cezanne enlightened me deeply. There were little information about art in China and we got the knowledge of the abstract painting just from the limited painting album available. We absorbed everything from what we saw.

　　It was inevitable that we couldn't get a whole picture of the abstract art. Anyhow, I got a bit basic idea of the nature and the style of the western abstract art, which was very different from what we learned in college. The communication between the teacher and the students under that specific situation hold profound meaning.

　　Mr Yu was modest and easy-going. We could talked with him and expressed our ideas freely. Once, while chatting, he showed me one of his paintings and asked for my comments. No any figurative images, only some signs and brush marks could be seen. I was puzzled, but curious. I told him my feeling and thought about the composition of the colour and brush mark in the painting. Gradually,  more and more students were attracted by him. We often made discussion together and gave comments on each others' painting and learned from each other. In once discussion, Mr Yu pointed out that " It's not enough for the painting only to express the sense of modernity. It is a must to express the nationality as well". His words then became the guidance of our abstract painting practice. In 1985, we( Ding Yi,Qin Yifeng,Edward, Wang Guqing and me) hold a group show " Modern Painting of Six Artists" in Shanghai Fudan University. Mr Yu was the main organizer. Many students from the university and artists in Shanghai came to visit the exhibition. Some students responded that they were unable to understand the paintings. But some said that the paintings reminded them of some personal experiences. We expressed our desire of pursuing modern painting through the exhibition. There were no galleries and art markets then in China. We were simple-minded. We showed our paintings just because of love of painting.

　　In the summer of 1985, I was enrolled in Central Arts and Crafts Institute (Now is named as Academy of Arts and Design, Tsinghua University) to learn fresco and decoration. But I still kept on my abstract painting practice. Luckily, I found that the abstract painting shared some common points with my major courses in the institute. The study in the institute helped me to get more ability to understand and make the judgment of the painting. In early 1990's I went to New York and stayed there for more than decade. In 2006, I came back to the homeland.

　　The abstract painting is the product of the western art movement, rebellion to centuries-long western figurative painting. Cezanne's analysis of the painting, Kandinsky and Malevich's inner spirit embodied in their color and brush mark and the accurate description of their painting have become one of the well-known symbols of western modern painting. Their idea  of "Art for art's sake" made the formalism reach perfection. But the western post-modern thought of 1980's and 1990's found new theme in art and painting. The story of success of abstract painting have turned to be history. People in foreign countries don't feel shocked or puzzled at abstract art any longer. The abstract art have come to every aspect of their life and have become part of their education. So the form of image or sign can't be the final target of abstract art exploration. The abstract painting should find new expression and new motivation. Duchamp took all the painting (including abstract painting) as a game to stimulate people's retinal. He neglected people's mental requirement expressed through painting activity. In fact, the mental world is intricate and it can be unscrambled by many methods. Duchamp just explained the meaning of painting from the view of science and put the myth of mental into the "concept". Only if the mental activity of human being keeps on going, the activity of painting will last forever. The abstract painting will lead us to pure self exploration.

　　If we can't express our inner indescribable desire through words, the abstract painting may be one of the best way to do it. Alike as music which can exist as a sound in time, the painting exists in space. When the brush touches the canvas, image will appear, which can be a piece of stone, a speck of dust. The image is both concrete and abstract, depending on people's explaination. Anyhow, there is an image in the canvas. The image will fix in the mind of the viewer through the sight. The "image" creats a so called "form" in the painting. But the form can't be the final purpose of the abstract painting.

　　I hope I could find a way to clear up the borderline between the concrete and the abstract in painting. The artists pay more attention to some relationships and meaning under an "image". Otherwise the abstract painting will get into the lair of formalism. The abstract expression should be viewed as an convenient way for artist to take, a series of spot left by the artist during his long journey of exploration of mystery, a series of mark left during the process, the representation of the matter. I would like to use the term " Loose Abstraction" to definite the character of the abstract activity. After post-modern art movement, the abstract painting doesn't mean to pursue the individual symbol any more as the abstract artists did fifty years ago. The abstract painting should be comprehensive and holistic. It doesn't mean to show sign, line or dot only, or just express the particular texture with particular method. The language of the abstract painting should be both pure and comprehensive. It can represent not only the objectivity but the idea of contemplation as well." To see a world in a grain of sand"，the oriental thinking, will regenerate the "abstract painting" originated  in western society. The new development may appear as the mixture of the objective world and the inner world of the artist.

　　Shall we give up the persistence on the symbolic sign and follow the free meditation instead? This is a question to be further discussed with the change of the abstract painting.

作者：冯良鸿