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先生问:为何画星星?
他人问:为什么星星都是五角的?
我儿时就喜欢画星星,星总是出现于宁静神秘的夜空中,我的每个疑问的答案,都藏在广大浩缈的夜空中某颗向我闪烁的星里,随着时光的迁移,我渐渐不再对每件事每个疑问刨根问底,但我还是相信答案存在于某个闪烁的星星里,当我用树枝或小石块在红色的泥土、白色的沙子、紫色的岩石或是水泥地上画星星,我便在感觉神秘而宁静的星空给我带来的和平、安宁的心情,而我置身其中,似乎也变的平静而透明。
家人都认为我适合学绘画。跟随爸爸学油画,爸是机械工程师兼美工,画的画大都是严谨而逼真的大人物或小人物(我和弟弟)。爷爷教我书法及古文,应该说严格而刻板,直到现在他的书房还总浮现在我眼前。低矮、灰暗的小阁楼,一束天光从屋顶两块玻璃瓦片洒落在书桌上,其中最细小的浮尘也拥有生命,飞着、舞着。而我却得挺着腰、直着背、握着笔、坐在小板凳上,所以我还是喜欢乱画。之后学会用画画发泄不满。初中快毕业大家商量;新辉既喜欢画画儿,别的方面又无突出表现。要不去读一所美术专科学校以便将来在美术方面发展。便考了美术装潢学校,学素描、国画、书法、图案、色彩。毕业后同画友学风格、学流派、学古典、学现代、学西方、学东方、学非洲、学美洲---直到我问自己:最想画的是什么?还是星星,是星星连接我的过去和将来,他是我所有疑问的藏身地,是我神秘的无限可能的宁静之所,至于为什么是五角的,我认为看上去很自然,如今我驾驶色彩和线条在画布的星空里航行了整十年,可能用另一个星球的时间来说,就是一念之间吧。
孩子问: 为什么总是画星星?
因为星星总是在变。
2006.10.21
One man asks: “Why paint stars?”
Another asks: “Why are your stars all five-sided?”
I have loved painting stars since childhood. Stars always appear in the serene, mysterious night sky. Answers to all my questions were hidden in those bright flickering stars in that vast unfathomable night sky. With passage of time, I slowly stopped trying to get to the bottom of every single question, but I still believed the answers reside in each flickering star. Every time I took a stick or a rock and drew stars on the red mud, or white sand, on purple cliffs or on cement floors, the mysterious and serene stars would give me a feeling of peace and security. Placing myself within them, it seems I also became serene and transparent.
My family members all felt that I was suited to studying art, so I studied oil painting together with my father. Dad was a machinery engineer and a craftsman, and he usually painted serious and realistic portraits of small characters (like me and my brother) as well as great ones. My paternal grandfather taught me calligraphy and classical Chinese, and I must say he was strict and methodical. Even today I often recall his study, a stooping, dark room in an attic, with a ray of daylight coming from two glass tiles in the roof and landing on his desk, illuminating the finest particles of dust which seemed to have life of their own, flying and dancing. I had to sit on my stool with back straight and upright, correctly holding the brush, so I loved making random drawings. Afterwards I learned how to use painting to vent my frustrations. When I was nearly ready to graduate from middle school, everyone thought: Since Xinhui loves painting, and has shown no special aptitude at anything else, why not send him to study at a specialized arts school, so that he may develop in this direction? I tested into an arts and stage design school, and learned line drawing, traditional Chinese painting, calligraphy, design, and color. After graduating I continued, together with my artist friends, to learn different styles and traditions, classical as well as modern, Western, Eastern, African, American…finally I asked myself, what do I really want to paint? It was still stars; stars connect my past and future, and are the hiding place for all my questions, the mysterious and serene realm where anything is possible. As for why they are five-sided: I feel they are natural-looking; I have been flying on these canvas starry skies, in lines and colors, for ten full years. Maybe from the perspective of another star, its just the blink of an eye.
A child asks: “Why always paint stars?”
Because stars are always changing.
Li Xinhui
10/21/2006
作者:李新辉
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